Good Day

Today is a GOOD day :) 

Interested?? I'll tell you why! First off, Marcus comes home from his work trip tonight! He will be here around 8pm and I cannot wait to see him! It's amazing how 3 days can make me miss a person so much. I got a lot done around the house (cleaning, reading, packing, etc) but I also didn't get as great of sleep as I normally do. Sure, Kona is here to be my watchdog, but I think I was downright terrified of going into labor late at night when Marcus was 3 1/2 hours away and sleeping soundly himself. Thank goodness that didn't happen - NOW, however.. if this baby wants to come, I would welcome him/her with open arms :)

Second off, I realized when I woke up this morning that today is July 27th. Marcus and I have been in Omaha for one whole year today. I remember the day as if it were yesterday. We had the U-haul and trailer out in Deb's cul-de-sac. We stayed at her place and decided to drink some cocktails the night before... in a tornado warning. We didn't get to bed until the wee hours of the morning and had to get up early to get on the road. Needless to say, the normal 6 hour drive took us about 10 hours. We finally got to our house at 9pm. I remember looking at the temperature gauge outside and it said 103 degrees. Matt Lee was with us for the trip, so we started to unload the U-haul the minute we got here. Megan stopped by after work and helped. I think we got everything unloaded within an hour - then we went to Perkins :)
It is now one year later and we are still here. I am very grateful that Omaha has treated us so well. I absolutely love my job and the area and living here has recently given Marcus a wonderful opportunity to start his career, and so far is loving it! So... thank you Omaha for giving Marcus and I a wonderful year experience - hopefully many more to come!

I have made a promise to myself and Kdawg that I will take her on a walk EVERY EVENING until I cannot possibly walk anymore (or until this baby decides to come). I enjoy walking around the neighborhood with her, even if it is just for a short 20 minute walk. Lately, after my walks, I find my pelvic pain growing stronger - which is really unfortunate, because while I'm walking, I am very relaxed. I wish I could snap my fingers and have my pelvic and rib pain taken away. I guess once this baby comes, it will all be worth the pain ;)

We are having company this weekend! Katie will be moving her stuff down here this weekend - I feel like it was just yesterday I was saying two more weeks until she moves her things down here... so crazy!! Then, next Wednesday, I go back to work!! I'm getting pretty anxious to get back into a daily routine!

Alright, that's enough for today - I hope everyone has a great day, like I intend to have :)

Independence

The act of being independent is in the form of an adjective : not influenced or controlled by others in matters of opinion,conduct, etc.; thinking or acting for oneself. 


I have got myself wondering lately how independent I really am. Growing up, I was very independent and was completely fine being by myself. As a little girl, I was told, I would grab my blanket and go off on my own to play with my dolls or toys. I didn't need to be rocked to sleep like my brother did. Even as a teenager, my attitude followed suit. I was fine being with my friends or family, but I was also completely content reading a book or listening to music on my own. I think my parents often said I was always off in my own little world and kept to myself, but that hasn't since been the case. The older I get, the more dependent I feel I become. I think I became dependent on my family members and girlfriends throughout college, and now that I am married, I feel I am very dependent on Marcus. 


Marcus left today to Kansas for training for work and won't be home until Wednesday night. I realized I haven't been away from him since April when I went to Hallock for my spring break and he stayed here to work. Three months is a long time to be inseparable from someone, especially for me. I think my dependence has come from Marcus and I moving away from our families about a year ago. He has been the person I rely on for everything. I think that is how marriage is supposed to be, but to some extent I find myself wondering how much I am capable of doing on my own. In some way, I want to appear more independent than I feel, if that makes any sense. Don't get me wrong, because I enjoy being around Marcus very much. We are usually always laughing when we're together and I am content just being by him. Like any other situation, I try to find the positive - and the only one I can think of is that maybe this is a good test for me. Marcus' new job allows him to travel and there are times when he could be gone for a week or so on a job site. Maybe this training is gearing me up for that - although, I will have a little one to take care of in the future :) 


I guess if I look on the bright side, I will possibly get a few walks in with Kdawg, and I can get some much needed cleaning done while he's away. Let's just hope this baby doesn't decide to make their appearance early - and by that I mean from now until Wednesday.. anytime after that would be fine with me ;)

*Show Me The Way*

If you are not familiar with the song, "Show Me the Way" by Styx, then you - by all means - should become familiar with it :)
To be completely honest, I never knew Styx existed until I met Marcus. It is true that we have a wide range of similar musical interests, but he was exposed to a different variety of music that I was not exposed to as a child - with Styx being one.
Back to my point... the lyrics to this song hold special meaning for me and I think our society today, which I find ironic because this song was written in 1990. Dennis DeYoung wrote this song for his son and the struggle to keep faith in a world filled with hatred. I find myself scanning the lyrics over and over again to gain even more meaning than I already have. The words are so powerful and I find myself looking back on my own faith through the years.
It's true for me that I have always had faith in the man upstairs and have always been comfortable with where I am in my faith. I will admit that I do not say my prayers every night as I once did when I was a young child. Reading that last sentence over makes me feel quite ashamed. Why is it that I can remember to take time out of my day to take Kona on a walk or call up a friend and talk for an hour, but it's difficult for me to remember to pray every night and thank God for all of the blessings I have? Why is it that when I am in trouble or I get bad news about a family member, the first person I turn to is God, but I can't remember to take 5 seconds out of my day to just say "Thank You." I think it ultimately comes down to making an effort and being conscious about them. I need to prioritize the important things in my daily life and take the time to just say "thanks."
We may not always believe that God is looking out for our best interest, but I think it's important to remember that he has a purpose for what he does. It may not seem like the best option for us right now, but somewhere, hidden underneath all of the pain, there is an answer and explanation for his decision. Is that answer always given to us right away? No. Is that answer something we can see? Of course not. The answer is overshadowed by the pain that we are feeling when something negative is brought into our lives that the positive is almost impossible to see right away. I'd like to think that is God's way of giving us a stronger backbone and making us understand pain in order to know the difference between pain and joy. Because ultimately, the joy overcomes the pain, right?
I hope that I did not offend anyone with the "faith" topic, as I know it is a bit of a touchy one for some. These are just merely my thoughts and ways of coping with things in everyday life. I, for one, will remember to say my prayers tonight and will definitely be making a conscious effort to continue it as time passes - and as my family grows.

For you readers, take a few minutes to listen to the Styx song here. It gives me a  sense relaxation and calms me and I hope it does the same for you :)

Babies GALORE!

Holy COW!! I know it's only 2 babies within 2 days, but it just is crazy to me! Two girls that graduated from HS a year after me have had their little ones only a day apart. I personally think that's pretty neat! One had a little girl, and the other had a little boy. Yay for babies :)
I just find it crazy that there are so many babies being born right around this time. Come August, I know of 5 babies due, including my own - which seems like a lot! I am becoming more and more anxious as the weeks go by. Yesterday, I had an appointment and my doctor told me some signs to look for and reasons to come to the hospital. She said that as of next week (37 weeks), the baby is considered full term and if I were to go into labor, that would be fine! I can honestly say that I think I am ready to have this baby. I know I have a few weeks left, but as for the packing and getting everything situated, I think Marcus and I are pretty much ready - and are very anxious! I completely understand that this baby will come when he/she wants to, it's just nice to know we are as prepared as we are going to get :) I read the "Labor/Delivery" chapter in the "What to Expect when you're Expecting" book 3 times this past weekend. Now, I understand that things will not go as I plan them, but at least I have a little better understanding of what may happen - and at this point, that makes me comfortable to a point. I still have doubts and many fears about being a mother. There are so many things a newborn needs to thrive and grow, and I am just scared that I won't do something correctly, or that I will forget something. I have thought a lot about my fears and decided to look at it from a different perspective: God had a plan in motion when Marcus and I got pregnant. I have to believe that he trusts me and that in turn, I need to trust myself.

"The greatest mistake you can make in life is to continually be afraid you will make one."

Elbert Hubbard 

Struggling

My goal has been to try and keep this blog updated for family and friends. There are days when I have multiple ideas for posts, and then there are days (like today) when I struggle to think of something to write about. I feel as if all my posts lately have been about the baby or the changes coming up. Marcus told me last week that my posts were becoming "philosophical". So now I'm really struggling!
I have decided to just go over a countdown of things coming up in the next few weeks! Countdowns are always fun, right?!

* 15 days until Katie moves her things down to Omaha
* 20 days until I go back to work
* 27 days until my students come back to school
* 37 days until Baby A is due to arrive

First off, I cannot believe that my summer is almost over and that I will go back to work in only 20 days. I am ready to go back and get into a routine. Don't get me wrong, it has been nice having time off to clean around the house and get ready for the baby, but there are times throughout the day that I find myself contemplating what I should do next. I am very organized and like to have things planned out, and it's driving me nuts that I am not in a daily routine. I am also excited to see my students after two months. It will be interesting to see how much they have changed over the summer and what stories they have to tell us about what they have been doing with their time.
We are very excited for Katie to be down here and to finally get all settled. There is still some work to do in the basement, but eventually, she can make it her own space :)
Last but not least, I am ready for this baby to be here. I am getting more and more uncomfortable by the day. I have pain along with achy, sore ligaments and muscles that I was completely unaware of before. I am told it is completely normal to have pelvic pain when I walk, but it still is a bit annoying. I can't imagine what I'm going to be like in 3 weeks when I go back to work. The heat is only going to get worse... I guess I can only hope the A/C is working in our building ;)
I think I am more anxious to meet our little one. It has been a very fast 8 months, that I can only hope the last 5 weeks fly by! I am so eager to find out if we are having a boy or a girl and just be able to see what it is that has been kicking/punching me all this time. Everyone has their ideas and guesses, but to be completely honest, I have absolutely NO idea anymore! At this point, I don't care what anyone else says... this baby is the gender it is and Marcus and I couldn't be more excited to just be parents :)

Do you think it's safe to say this baby will be a Sioux fan?!

Dog Sense

Three short years ago, Marcus and I made a big step in our relationship and got a dog. 

We named her Kona :) She has been an all around wonderful dog. She only managed to chew up my reading glasses once and track garbage and blood all throughout our old townhome after cutting her tongue on a can. I can honestly say, we are very fortunate to have such a "laidback" and calm dog. She rarely barks or growls at others and is easily pleased. Her current favorite past time is running around in the backyard chasing squirrels and birds, and "going to the tree." (That is a bit of an inside joke ;) 

For the past couple years, she has always been "Marcus' dog". She would follow him around wherever he went and listened to whatever he said. As for me, she liked my company, but not to the same extent as Marcus' company. 

In the past 8 months, all of that has changed. I have quickly become Kona's master, so to speak, and her demeanor towards Marcus has changed quite drastically. Yes, she still listens to him and enjoys roughhousing with him when the opportunity presents itself, but her dedication, should we say, has changed a bit. She follows me everywhere I go, and this is not an exaggeration. She will follow me outside, into the kitchen, to the nursery, and even into the bathroom. I have absolutely no privacy when she's around (which is all the time). One recent discovery was the basement. Marcus and I recently noticed that before, Kona would not go into the basement. She absolutely despises that room and is very stubborn when it comes to either one of us going down there. In the past 4 months or so, she will not follow Marcus down there. He leaves the door open for her and what does she do? She will walk all over the house until she finds me, and when she does, she plops down right next to me - all the while, Marcus is calling her name and whistling for her to go downstairs. Now, when I go downstairs, she is on my heels. I find this very interesting just by knowing her hatred for the basement. It doesn't matter if Marcus and I are both down there or not, she will follow me, but not him. 

I read up a bit on dogs behavior when their owner is pregnant and there were lots of discussion boards on how animals were acting very strangely. Kdawg's behavior is strange, yes, but I know it is purely out of protection for me. It will be interesting to see how she acts the closer my due date comes :)

Household fun

Today is a day filled with finishing up some house projects - a much needed task... as I am starting to get antsy and feel that we have SO much to do before baby arrives, which by the way, is in only a short 6 weeks - as well as before KT moves in!
As you can probably guess, our projects today were getting the nursery in order as well as putting up the wall in the basement so KT can have privacy in her own bathroom :) Marcus took me along to Lowes with him to buy 2x4's, nails, and other supplies and I'd like to think I was a huge help. As for you KT... expect the bill in the mail here this next week; Marc said he would be sure to send it ASAP ;) (jk)
I am currently sitting in the basement writing this blog post as Marcus measures, cuts, nails, measures, nails, and cuts some more. We are jamming out to some Steve Miller Band and enjoying our quality time together... gosh we're awesome :) Meanwhile, Kdawg is "freaking out." She doesn't like the basement the way it is... but she is overly jumpy and won't leave my side.
So here it is... the update some of you have been waiting for. I took quite a few pictures of the nursery so you can see what it looks like! I will also take some more pictures of the bathroom wall here as it progresses.
Enjoy!!

Diaper Bag!

Marcus measuring for the shelving

Kinda dark... but looking in from the hallway

Closet

Crib

Oh Kona :)

Marcus starting on the bathroom wall

Progress! 

Almost done!

There you are KT!

Lyrics

I'm not sure about you readers, but music is a huge part of my life. Whenever I am stressed or upset, I turn to my iPod. The same goes for when I am happy or content. My iPod is somewhat of a "saving grace" for me and I think that has something to do with my upbringing.

I always grew up with music blaring throughout the house, whether it was the old vinyl records my parents had from their childhood, or those square things we used to call "cassette" tapes ;) My father is a connoisseur of music and is notorious for cranking the volume until we can't hear the thoughts in our own heads. I am happy to report that I have taken that trait from him. I would much rather listen to music with the windows down while driving, then hold a conversation with someone. Now don't get me wrong... I enjoy having meaningful conversations with others, but if a good song is on the radio, that is usually priority :) I think lyrics sometimes say so much more then than chatter.

I can recall many times where I was either humiliated with music, or where music was used as an educational tool in my childhood. One instance I will share is this: my very first car... a white pontiac grand am, did not have a working gas gauge. One day, I found myself on the side of the road and couldn't figure out why. Well, I came to find that I was out of gas. I had to call my dad and tell him the story. He chose to wake me up the next morning with "Running on Empty" by Jackson Browne. Now, if none of you have heard this song, you need to YouTube it and listen. I will never forget the sight of my dad singing along with Mr. Browne - with the biggest "shit grin" on his face - or the instant smile that comes to my face whenever I hear this particular song.

Another memory I have - along with my siblings - is the infamous "Name that Tune" game. While driving in the car for longer periods of time, dad would put in his favorite music and quiz us on the lyrics of each song. We would have to listen to every word and answer questions afterwards. We also got high fives and bragging rights when we would be able to answer the "who sings it" question first. These trips went by so fast and it was because we were so occupied with music. There are so many memories I have growing up with music - and they all give me a perma-smile :) I also personally enjoy the variety of music I was introduced to as such a young girl. I am proud to know every single word to a song sung by Journey or Chicago. I am also fortunate that music is a love that Marcus and I share... and it makes those long drives go by so much faster ;)

I will never forget exactly where I was when I first heard "Life in a Northern Town", or the feeling I get when any REO Speedwagon song comes on my iPod or the radio. There are certain songs that give you a certain feeling that is indescribable, and the greatest part is - NO ONE can take that feeling away. Music is one of those things that gives me a sense of contentment and that is something I will never take for granted. 

I encourage you to think back on songs that have given you feelings or memories you will never forget. Cherish those memories and feelings. They are no one elses but yours, and that is a beautiful thing! Feel free to comment and share :)