It's been close to a month now since someone very near and dear to me was told she had melanoma. THANKFULLY, it had not penetrated the skin yet and she, along with her dermatologist, were VERY proactive in getting it checked out. Therefore, a procedure was done and no chemo or radiation needed to be followed up at this time. Whew!
This is one of those cards in life that I can't help but feel pulling me down. No matter how positive one person can be, and how much strength it takes to fight back the tears after getting a mind-blowing phone call like that, there comes a breaking point for everybody. Today has been mine. It's weird, because it was close to a month ago, and I haven't really cried yet. I understand everyone deals with certain issues differently, and this is a prime example of how I deal with things. I attempt to hold back the tears and frustration and try to stay positive until one day I just can't hold it back anymore. I feel as if this "black plague" has been overshadowing me - even in the midst of fun times and positive things - but I just haven't been able to shake it. I feel like such a hypocrite right now because I get so frustrated with people who are always negative or who can't seem to look at the positive side of things - and that is ME right now. There are so many positives with this situation, and up until this point, I have looked at all of them. I think it's just that I haven't dealt with my anger or frustration or sadness throughout the whole situation yet, which is why I'm being the one thing I HATE being - a negative nancy. Maybe I just realized that "it could be so much worse" and I need to be grateful for yet another light at the end of the tunnel!
Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same. ~Francesca Reigler
